Hairdo by BMW

The first time I got onto the back of our motorcycle, I was aware riding pillion is a special experience.

My father is absolutely opposed to motorbikes. The mere thought of his only daughter on the back of such a monster is horrifying to him. So for most of my life, I spared him the agony.

Until I fell in love with an avid motorcyclist who has been riding the beast for about forty years. On the back of the BMW riding to Greyton under a starry night sky I felt it. A wild and wonderful sense of freedom tinged with a little bit of anxiety. Easily mistaken for exhilaration.

This exuberant joy was intensified by the sheer novelty of defying my own fear and Good Girl tendencies to take a ride on the wild side. I found myself singing in the moonlight while I clung to the driver for dear life.

The Gear

The air was crisp and the stars right there above us. Almost within reach. I was thrilled.

A couple of rides later my beloved shared with me that whilst I am undoubtedly a natural pillion, it is a strain if I hang on like a limpet. He explained the holding on tightly meant I was leaning forward adding my own weight to his. I understood immediately that this would place an undue strain on his arms and make the handling of the bike even more difficult.

From that moment on wards I made a point of holding onto the bike or my love’s jacket pockets with my weight firmly in my own seat. That is when it first struck me.

Every time we get on the bike, I can sense exactly where we are in our relationship. If, for any reason, there is stress or strain in our everyday being together, I find myself having to consciously decide to trust. Exactly as I do in our relationship. Choose to trust. Choose to be fully present and engaged. As soon as we are cruising, defying death (my father would chorus) I know with crystal clarity how I feel about us. I also understand Jan’s contention that taking a ride on the bike is a meditation. It has a way of bringing things into sharp focus.

Invariably I gain a sense of purpose after a long trip on the bike. Ideas for stories or blogs such as this one. Or decisions about what I want for myself and us.

I know that I want to be in my own seat, trusting and connected, but playing my own part. Making sure that I go with the flow. Leaning into the corners and making sure that we are in sync.

Trusty Steed

Above all, finding the perfect balance between you and me. Between responsibility and trust. Between being aware of the rough road and bumps along the way, as well as the sheer pleasure and joy of the ride. Knowing.. to ride is to relate.